Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Rejoice ALWAYS? Well, Maybe Not Today!

Philippians 4:4-5
Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!
Let your gentleness be known to all men. The Lord is at hand.

It's a quiet Tuesday morning and spent time visiting with God! Always a great way to start any day Right? But today I do not feel like rejoicing. Spent most of the morning thinking of my son Asa. Some tears too! God does not seem to be to present at this moment. And again I will say I do not feel like Rejoicing!!

My son Asa is in Marine bootcamp. It has been ten weeks now! Ten weeks with no hearing his voice. The letters have been so amazing! What a time this is for a mom! A time of change that moms have been going through since God made sons.

*On one hand I could not be happier for him and oh I am so proud. (I know pride comes before the fall but I cannot help it!)
*On the other hand I miss him and did not want him to be away and leave so soon. 18 years was not enough time to say and teach him all that I wanted too.
*On the other hand God has told me very firmly that "He is My Son" in that voice of His! And I know that this is a fact. God has managed every detail of this operation!
*On the other hand I do not feel like rejoicing today! And I don't feel like God is near!! I know that he is,... but today,..just not feeling it!!
*On the other hand I so know to my core that God is here right now loving me. He is holding me as I write this! And I have to keep saying that to myself.
*On the other hand being a mom seems like a gruel joke right now!
*On the other hand It has been so much Fun!!! aka......(absurdity, ball*, bigtime, blast*, buffoonery,celebration, cheer,clow
foolery, frolic, gaiety,gambol, game*, goodtime, grins, high jinks,holiday,
horseplay,jesting, jocularity, joke,joking, jollity, joy,junketing,
laughter, living it up, merriment,merrymaking, mirth,nonsense,
pastime,picnic, playfulness,pleasure, recreation,rejoicing, relaxation,
riot,romp, romping, solace,sport, tomfoolery*, treat,whoopee
ball*, bash*, big time,blast*, blow out,celebration, cheer,clambake,
delight,dissipation, distraction,diversion,divertissement,
enjoyment, feast, frolic,fun, fun and games,gaiety, game, good
time,grins, high time, laughs,leisure activity, lots of laughs,
merriment,merrymaking, party,pastime, picnic, play,recreation,
sport, spree, surprise,treat, wingding)

Okay, I now feel like rejoicing and dancing. I guess He is with me after all and this is not a joke, it is just life! I am going to live it until God brings me home. Plus ,I am all out of hands. Rejoice in this day alone!!! I know I am.